[en] my sassy girl 12 [re-uploaded]

I was walking with her to her house… I don’t really like taking girls back to their house. To make it worse, it reminded of that one time with an ex-girlfriend who I dated before I went off to the military (Translator’s Note: South Korea has mandatory military service that lasts about 2 years). Right after we broke up, I took her back to her house then too… T.T

But I don’t have a choice this time… she might beat me up.

We had to switch subway lines at the City Hall station and go all the way to Bupyeong. It takes about an hour. It was a bit late at night, and we must have missed the evening rush.

It was a bit weird for both of us to fall asleep there, so we decided to play games on the way. There are about a million games you can play in the subway…. a lot… I’ll list them off later.

The game we decided to play at the time involved a line drawn on the floor with a key or a coin. Whenever somebody steps over the line with left foot, she wins. If they step over with their right foot, I win.

The winner gets to hit the loser with a finger (T/N: Just like in the movie). I am very good at games involving 50/50 chance.

I never lose at Odd/Evens… ever (T/N: a game where one person shakes a random number of coins in his or her hands, and the other guesses whether the number of coins is odd or even. Winner takes all the coins). If anyone wants to challenge me, let me know. I need to pay my phone bills.

Ah ha! Three high school kids are coming our way!

I kept chanting over and over again… right foot… right foot… right foot… right… foot!

First kid steps over with his right foot. Yes!

Second kid also steps over with his right foot. Third kid… ugh, he steps over with his left foot. It was so close… I could’ve gotten a perfect victory.

Me: It’s 2:1, so I’ll just hit you once, okay?

Her: No way. You hit twice, and I’ll hit once.

What’s her deal? I would’ve taken the generous deal…

Me: Have it your way then. Here we go!

I first place my fingers over her forehead. With my middle finger, I bend it at a hard angle with my thumb… Yes, I am sadistic, so I take my sweet time and wait couple of seconds.

She begins to strain her eyes while holding up her shoulders… she gets tired of waiting, and opens her eyes.

This was my chance! As soon as she opened her eyes and relaxed her shoulders…

BAM!!!

Sound of a pumpkin cracking could be heard.

People within 5 meter radius started to stare at us. It was a success! It hurts the most when the person relaxes…. I told you I was sadistic.

Her: Fine, I won’t hit mine so let’s just call it quits.

She must’ve gotten really scared. Hah, I knew it… She then made a suggestion.

Her: This is unfair, both of us using fingers.

Me: What are you talking about? Let’s just leave it as it is.

Her: No way… I get to slap you on the face instead.

Me: Then I’ll slap too!

Her: How can you even think of slapping a girl on the face?

Me: What, girls can’t get slapped but guys can?

Her: Of course! Want to test out the theory?

Me: … You’re right. Girls can’t get slapped.

Now, if I lose, I get slapped… she is the law, after all…

Whoa… five soldiers on leave were coming to our side of the car. They were all privates or PFCs… and they were still very disciplined.

3 meter…. 2 meter… 1 meter… here… we… go!!!

“Left foot. Left foot. Left foot. Left foot. Left foot.” …. -_-;;

They’re on leaves… and they still march on beat? Damn newbies…

Her: All right, here we go.

Me: Here what go?

Her: Come on..

Me: Hey! Look at that moon. Isn’t it lovely? Do you think maybe rabbits really do live there? (T/N: Common East Asian fairy tale)

Her: ….

Me: Hey, do you remember when you learned the quadratic equation from school? Well-

Right on the bat, she hits me on the jaw. So that takes care of one hit. There were four left…

This was no joke. She was really going to slap me full force in front of all these people. Everyone was staring at us, realizing what was about to happen.

‘Fine, just kill me…’ I closed my eyes tightly. She lightly touched my left cheek. She was being generous and letting me off easily! She looked like an angel then.

She then lightly touched my right cheek. 3rd slap… she touched my left cheek lightly again. 4th slap…
She was so nice… and the last sla-

SMACK!

My left cheek was on fire. I literally saw stars… she let me relax with all the light touches and then went hard on the last one… for maximum effect…

Everyone that just stared at us is about to die… from stifling their laughter. The five soldiers from before started to snigger even though they didn’t know what was going on. I was about to teach them a lesson as a former sergeant, but I left them alone, remembering how crappy life is during the military service…

My left cheek became all red and swollen.

The guy next to me suddenly stood up.. he knew exactly what kind of game we were playing. ‘He’s a guy,’ I thought, ‘he’s going to take my side… right?’

He walked in opposite direction from our line for a while, then turned around and came toward us.

Right foot… right foot… right foot… My mouth became dry and I was stretching my neck beyond capacity. I felt like a deathrow inmate waiting to hear his name. I was shaking without noticing.

‘Sir!! Please!’ I shouted inside.

I suddenly stood up.

“YES!! Right foot! RIGHT FOOT!!!! WOOHOO!!!”

I felt like the king of the world. The guy turned around and grinned. ‘Thank you so much!’

Me: All righty! Here we go!

Her: … (ha! Losers can’t say anything.)

I place my finger just like last time. The level of power behind this finger is going to be very, very different. My grudge and sorrow all carried by this single finger… The middle finger starts to shake from strains. The whole arm starts to shake.

Everyone around us has become very quiet, too intent on watching us. (I’ve never seen subway that quiet in my life…)

I was about to hit… but then,

Me: Hey. Call me oppa once and we’ll call it quits. (T/N: Oppa is, traditionally, what girls call their older brother or older male friends. In modern context, this is a common title girls use for their boyfriends.)

She has never called me that once. It has always been ‘Hey you’, ‘bastard’, ‘idiot’, ‘retard’… These are her pet names for me.

Her: … Oppa…

Suddenly, I felt very warm inside. My cheek stopped hurting. It’s pretty fun playing games in the subway…